There are a number of things that are making me slightly stressed at the moment. I can't say that my life is particularly stressed in comparison to others but there are still a couple of things which drift through my head at night. I'm going to share them with you now if you don't mind.
1. Having £0.00
I'm very poor. I have no money. That's stressful because when I go to the pub I can't get a round in and that's something I like doing. So that's sad.
2. Flying
I'm going to Norway next week and I haven't flown since I was 16. This ones more apprehension than stress. I used to fly quite often by myself when I was younger so I know I can do it and the rational part of my brain is telling me to stop being a bloody idiot, of course I won't get lost. But then the part of my brain that knows what I'm like keeps whispering that if there's someone who can get so lost they miss their plane, it's me. I'm hoping she's not right.
3. Finding a bloody work placement.
My university year is over and I found out about half an hour ago that I finished the year with a 2:1. Hurrah. Fantastic news and I must say, I'm pretty pleased. There were times this year when I was sure I was bound to fail. But no! T'was not to be and here I am.
My course requires me to do a 40 week placement and this is proving impossible to find.
As mentioned in previous posts, I live in the middle of nowhere. The middle of nowhere is a lovely place to live; it's very calm and quiet and not a whole lot happens. So although it is a wonderful place to be, it isn't exactly the hub of PR activity. That would be London. Another fun fact? London is expensive. Now, I'm perfectly willing to move to do my placement - it's actually preferable - but to find a placement which is 40 weeks in length and pays enough so I can actually afford to live...the struggle is real, children.
It's actually becoming a real struggle to stay positive about my whole placement issue.
Let me run you through the process that I have gone through about 80,794 times.
- I find a job description which - wow! - fulfils all my needs. I'm totally suitable. These jobs are usually super interesting and the companies seem perfect for me. This is exciting! What's that over there, people? It's hope!
- I spend an age researching said company to get to know more about them, find out what kinds of things they do, what kind of people work there etc.
- I write a cover letter. I have a number of friends who have a generic cover letter that they just enter the right name into and then send. But nope, I spend a while crafting the perfect cover letter and selling myself. How could they not want me? I tick all of the boxes. This is sure to be the one! I'm gonna get a job!
- I sent my cover letter and CV.
- I wait.
- I wait.
- I wait.
- [repeat]
You see, the really annoying thing about applying for internships - and I am sure that all of you who have tried to find one share my frustrations - is that they very seldom reply. Do you know how annoying that is?!? I am fully aware the companies are extremely busy. I don't expect continuing correspondence or an in-depth analysis of why I am not suitable for the advertised job. I know many places receive a lot of applications and it's just not practical. But being on this side of it, it's so disheartening to know that every application I send off will, more than likely, never receive anything back.
Weep.
I have until mid-December to find an internship. I'm not entirely sure what will happen if I don't find one because apparently that has never happened before. But there's always a first time for everything and I'm starting to feel more and more that I may be that first time. Many of the people on my course have already got placements and a lot of them have actually already been there working for weeks. I'm really happy for them - and I don't say that in a completely bitter way because they're my friends and I really am very happy for them because they're not in my situation. Many of them have their dream jobs and that must be the best feeling in the world. But it's making Facebook a no-go area, with posts of people flying here and there, living the dream, #LovingLife. Alright, alright.
I just want to be happy too, goddammit!
So, in closing, if you're reading this and think that you might fancy taking on a very desperate intern, go ahead! I'm right here! Put me out of my misery, people.
I'll work super hard and I can make good tea and I understand computer'y things and I can use all those analytical tools and and and...
pretty please?
M x
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